In Amazing Resumes  published in the USA (and in Brilliant CV  for the UK and Resumes that get shortlisted for Australasia) I use the idea of the first date as a way of thinking about what you are trying to do in a job application (i.e. emphasise the positive, eliminate the negative, and maximise the shared values and experience etc).

Selena Dehne from JIST (my US publisher) once tweeted about another great JIST book of job search and dating, her tweet prompted me to take this further and to think about those date killing comments like:

• “you don’t sweat much for such a big build”,
• “would you like to come back to my sheltered accommodation?”
• “oh that, It’s just an ankle bracelet, they’ll remove it in six months”,
• “wow your mum is really hot, do you take after your father?” etc.

What are the statements that might kill an interview stone dead. Here are a few to get you started:

• “well I was going to put the money back in the till at the end of the month”
• “the stocking on my head? Well I suppose I can remove it if you insist”
• “better out than in”
• “sorry the zipper is broken, and anyway I have nothing to be ashamed off”
• “what are you looking at?”
• “I know where you live”
• “My last employer? I was hardly ever there, I hated it, but I would turn up every day for you”
• “are there many single or available staff here?”
• “sorry I’m late, but the bar-tender insisted on telling me his life story”
• “hang on a sec, incoming test message…”
• “well thats the stupidest question I’ve ever heard!”
• “say, wont you have retired by the time I start?”
• “can you get me a coffee sweety?”
• “I know an excellent hairdresser, would take years off you”